My aunt didn’t invite me to her wedding while inviting my brothers and other cousins. I’m just very upset now because my aunt’s wedding is soon and I learned that I can’t go to the wedding because she didn’t invite me. I have a physical disability and I need crutches but I can handle myself. The invitation to our family says my parents and my brothers.
My dad talked to my aunt and she thought that the venue isn’t friendly and comfortable for me and that’s why she didn’t invite me. If that’s the only reason, isn’t that something I should decide? Maybe I can handle myself in that venue. Maybe my brother and dad will help me if I needed help. She excluded me because I have a disability. My parents told me that I need to understand that it’s her wedding and she gets to decide who comes and I can’t be upset and I should respect her decision. I told them that if she thinks I’m not good enough to be at her wedding then I don’t want to see her or talk to her again but they tell me that I should continue to be a good niece and respect her and be friendly with her. I don’t understand why?
Do I have a right to be upset and not wanting to talk to her again? tl;dr: Aunt didn’t invite me to her wedding because I’m disabled and she thinks I can’t handle the venue. I’m very upset and don’t want to talk to her again but parents tell me it’s not a big deal and expect me to forget about it and act as it never happened. (Ziongirl)
Dominick Evans, a filmmaker and activist who works for the Center for Disability Rights says, “This situation is unfortunately more common than you’d think. Family exclusion is one of the worst most hurtful forms of betrayal disabled people often must face. If the people who are supposed to love you the most and unconditionally are unwilling to accommodate your disability, then who will? Her aunt could have easily scheduled her wedding in a more accessible setting, and included her niece. That would have been the right thing to do. Many family members see disabled people as a burden or an embarrassment, and this aunt seems to not want her niece to be present implying she may find her niece’s disability embarrassing.”
In a follow-up Ziongirl published on July 19, she stated she had confronted her aunt, with her two brothers, offering to boycott the wedding if an invite was not extended to their sister. The aunt insisted the lack of invite was for the teen’s own comfort. As the post explains, “She said it’s not pity it’s genuine concern for my well-being. She doesn’t want me [to] see other girls my age do the things I can’t do and feel jealous and inadequate.”
To read the entire article: http://www.refinery29.com/2016/07/117293/wedding-disability-not-invited-reddit republished in http://www.teenvogue.com/story/reddit-user-with-disability-excluded-family-wedding